- Animation = My life (but sometimes I wish I had a break)
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robsomebody
- June 4th, 23:35
I've been largely silent on my animation this term. I don't like to talk about the things I do too much for a couple reasons:
1) I fear most people don't get/aren't interested in the work I do. Well, that's not entirely true, because I've yet to meet someone who doesn't say "That SO cool!" when they find out I'm an animator. But then 9 times out of 10, their eyes glaze over if I begin to talk shop in too much detail!
2) I like to live by the words of one of the Roosevelt's (I think it was Teddy): "Speak softly, and carry a big stick." In short, shut up and let your work create the hype.
That said, I've been painfully busy for the last 20 weeks. I've had no break between semester's 3 and 4 with Animation Mentor (my school), for some strange calendar reason that I don't understand. Each term is 3 months long, and basically has anyone who's really trying to succeed working 6-7 days per week with weekly deadlines every single Sunday at 12:00pm PST. Normally we have 1-2 weeks off between semesters, but for whatever reason, this round we had no break. My mind is so scattered right now I hardly know where I am. No joke -- a friend called me tonight to ask me about something that happened at a party I attended just this past Saturday...and it took me 2 minutes to recall even attending that party!
I am currently working on what should be my greatest piece of animation yet. To be honest, it is my best work. But I'm also that much more critical of myself. It's not about grades, it's not about getting pats on the back from friends or family. I want a job in the industry by the end of the year. If I crawl too far into 2010 without a single job offer, I might lose my mind. So to that end, I'm pushing myself incredibly hard. I sleep minimally, hit the gym when I can to blow off stress more than to keep a healthy routine going, and feel a steady bit of schizophrenia as I simultaneously LOVE the artform and hate my own work.
Only 2 weeks left on this shot. I've been working on it for 7 weeks now. I hope it turns out okay. I'm going to SIGGRAPH in August and will be bringing 100 copies of my demo reel DVD to pawn off to every single animation studio recruiter there. I have no other purpose in going than to sell myself and my work. Well, that and to hang out with other fellow Animation Mentor students and meet the founders of my school who will also be there.
All the stress aside.... I still can't believe how far I've come in making the impossible dream a reality. I haven't gotten a job yet, but I know that I'm very close to getting one because I look back my college years of animation dreaming (when I studied nothing and did absolutely no art or animation of any kind...I was an ENGLISH MAJOR for frak's sake!) and I wonder what the hell I thought would get me a job in the industry back then. What back door did I think I could slip into??? I'm getting very highly specialized now and I *still* fear I might not get a job! There ain't no backdoors in animation, that's for sure! I even recall my pencil animation days at Pratt and while I love those memories very, very much -- I realize now I was still incredibly far from getting a job in the industry with my skills at that time.
I'm very close to my dream job now. Very close. But that just makes me work all the harder and scrutinize my work to the point of having panic attacks (like I did today).
I was going to end this on something else, but as previously stated, my brain is so fried that I'm nearly that guy from Memento sometimes. Not even kidding. I had a conclusion, but who knows what it was. Good night.